The Phone Call You Never Want to Get

It was 2 a.m. on June 17th when the phone rang—the kind of call you never want to get. I awoke from a hard sleep and answered groggily, “Hellllloooo?”

A loud wailing came across the line, followed by a voice crying, “She’s gone!”

Moments later, after shaking off the fog of sleep, I realized the voice belonged to my daughter’s soon-to-be fiancé.

I asked, “Who is gone?”

Words I never imagined hearing followed: “She’s gone. Amber is gone.”

The hours, days, weeks, months, and years that followed have left a permanent imprint on my heart. I have remembered every one of them.

Amber Nicole

On the morning of October 2, 1983, God gave my wife Janice and me an incredible, amazing gift. Wrapped in human flesh, this gift came with the joy of giving her a name: Amber Nicole.

Amber grew up with a passionate heart for Jesus. She loved all the things little girls love. She was talented, full of joy, loved people deeply—and especially loved her mom and dad. And oh, how we loved her.

Her passion for missions grew over time, especially through the many short-term mission trips we took together with our church family. When her two younger brothers came along, Amber welcomed them with open arms and quickly became a devoted big sister.

After high school, Amber joined a mission organization called Youth With A Mission (YWAM), serving with them for two to three years. Later, she moved to Colorado, where she lived and worked.

While driving from Texas back to Colorado very late one night, tragedy struck. An antelope darted out in front of her car. She swerved to avoid it, the vehicle flipped four or five times, and she was thrown from the car. Amber died instantly.

This June 16th, 2025, will mark 16 years since that day. I can tell you—I miss her every single day.

Grief moved into our home that dreadful morning. You never get over the loss of a child, but by God’s grace, you get through it. To those who have lost a child, I would say: cry as much as you need to. As often as you want to. It’s okay.

I sometimes see a young lady walk past with long, beautiful hair and I’m reminded of Amber. I’ve visited some of her favorite stores, just knowing how much she enjoyed shopping there. Hundreds of little things bring her to mind—and they always will. The same will likely be true for you. And that’s okay. You should remember them.

Healing and Hope

Scripture tells us that the Lord heals the brokenhearted—and He has done that, and continues to do that, for my wife and me. We’ve been surrounded by amazing friends and family, whom God used to help sustain us in our darkest times.

In 2011, we launched a mission initiative called AmberFund. Initially funded by our incredible circle of friends and family, it has since been sustained by generous contributions from others.

AmberFund is designed to help young people go on short-term mission trips. Since its inception nearly 15 years ago, the fund has helped over 1,100 young people travel to more than 80 countries to share the gospel. This is one of the ways we’ve found to remember and honor our daughter.

Jesus said, “Unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone. But if it dies, it produces much fruit.” (John 12:24)

Thousands have come into the Kingdom—because of her death and the obedience of those who have gone out in her place. Allow God to take your grief and your brokenness and bring beauty from those ashes. He can. And He will.